monthly milestones

Reese’s Monthly Growth Series // 12

December 17, 2017 by lauren.anvari@gmail.com 1 Comment

29.5 inches long (63.89th percentile), 18 inches head circumference (72nd percentile), 19 pounds 5 ounces (42nd percentile), started walking, stands up from sitting on her own, likes to give high five and kisses, loves food, sleeps like a champ, loves to play with her brother and sister, dives out of your arms when she wants to go down, still only says bye-bye and likes to use it whenever possible, is still nursing on demand, no teeth whatsoever

Here it is, the last first-year monthly update that I will ever do (probably). I’m feeling all the feelings. My baby has completed one whole year around the sun and while it was the hardest year our family has ever been through (that’s a whole separate post) it was also filled with lots of love and light.

This month, much to our surprise, Reese started walking! I was certain she wouldn’t walk until she was over a year old, but true form she likes to keep me on my toes. She also started standing up from sitting without needed to hold onto anything and while she still prefers crawling for its speed at the moment, I think it’s only fair to say that we have a little toddler on our hands!

Reese has such a funny personality. She comes across as super serious, but we’re learning that this is all just a bunch of hot air and that in fact, she is a complete and utter jokester. In Persian, she would be called “shey-toon” which is what you call someone who is incredibly cheeky and mischevious. And my oh my is she ever shey-toon! She likes to hit me, and when I take her hand and show her out to touch me gently she tried to yank her hand away in order to hit me again at which point I put her down and tell her that she must be gentle. She promptly begins to cry REAL tears, so after a few seconds I pick her up and she IMMEDIATELY hits me again. This can go on and on and on. At dinner time she LOVES to eat, but she hates when we try to help her and gives us the most disapproving furrowed brow look that I’ve ever seen, often accompanied with a shriek of some sort. Yet all I need to do is look at her and mirror her expression and she’ll burst into laughter. She’s also taken to flinging herself out of our arms when she wants to go down, which is just a good time had by all and definitely keep our reflexes sharp.

Reesey Pea continues to sleep so well, I’m definitely optimistic that the sleep issues are truly behind us. She liked to give high-five and huge wet slobbery kisses but she is not at all cuddly. When I try to hug her she flings herself away from me. Even while nursing she pushes away from me and stretches my breast as much as possible in order to achieve the maximum distance from me while still being able to feed, which let’s just say isn’t doing me any favors.

Asher and Bennett love playing with Reese now that she’s more engaging and she, in turn, loves it as well. It nearly always ends in tears but it’s super cute while it lasts. Reese is super proud of her one and only word ‘bye-bye’ and likes to say is whenever given the opportunity. She doesn’t like saying it when prompted and will often stubbornly wait until the person has already left to say it, but at other times all I have to do it say “alright, we better get going” and she’ll start saying goodbye and waving proudly.

Unlike her brother and sister, Reese puts EVERYTHING in her mouth so I really have to watch her, but seeing as she’s our third child, a lot slips through the gaps. She still doesn’t have any teeth, for which I’m grateful quite frankly because she likes to gnaw on everything. Reese is also different from Asher and Bennett in that she will ask to go to other people even when I’m holding her and will sometimes not want to come back to me.

This past year has been the hardest of my life but I’m so thankful to have Reese in our family. She is such a funny, mischevious, curious, loving, intelligent, super active child. She makes our family feel whole and adds a level of dimension that is just so awesome. She always keeps me guessing. I honestly have no idea who she’ll turn out to be or in what direction her personality is going. The moment I think I have a handle on it she switches it up and leaves me feeling baffled all over again.

Reese’s Monthly Growth Series // 10

October 29, 2017 by lauren.anvari@gmail.com Leave a Comment

Waves bye-bye, asks to be picked up by reaching her arm towards you, still no teeth, light sleeper, light eater, wants to be held all the time, prefers mommy over anyone else, first time being put to bed at night without mommy, generally easy going, very stubborn, not very cuddly

So I’m only two and a half weeks late with this monthly update. Everything seems like so much more effort with the third. Even so, Reese is such a funny little thing and a joy to be around.

Reesey Pea, is very stubborn and quite vocal about her preferences. She’s very serious around most people just but when she’s comfortable with you she can be quite the little ray of sunshine. She still screams to get your attention, which isn’t too pleasant, but I guess when you’re a third child you have to find ways to be heard above the cacophony.

Reese waves bye-bye by holding her arm out straight and the flapping her wrist but it’s the way that she asks to be picked up that really gets me. She extends her arms towards you and flaps her wrists and looks at you with such longing with those big brown eyes of hers that it pierces your heart.

This little one still isn’t eating all that much, but I’m thinking she probably eats a normal amount for a child her age, whereas Asher and Bennett were the oddballs with their consuming massive amounts of food. I’m such the fact that she’s still all gums doesn’t help anything either. She makes do, for the most part, mashing her food with her gums, but there are some foods that just prove too challenging. I mean, she doesn’t even have a hint of a tooth, but I’m really starting to relish her toothless grin. As cute as that first tooth will be when it comes I know a part of me will be sad that she’s moving yet another step away from infancy.

Reese is so dainty and petite and I’m really cherishing the feel of her tiny body in my arms, I only wish she were a cuddly child. She has no issue voicing her displeasure when I kiss her one too many times.

We went to Texas for a friend’s wedding which meant we left the kids with Raf’s parents and my mother-in-law put Reese to bed and although she did fuss a bit they were able to do it! So that definitely opens up a whole new world of possibilities to us. It’s nice to know that even though she won’t take a bottle, she is able to go to sleep without being nursed as long as I’m not there.

This little girl is either constantly on the move and getting into everything or she wants to be held and not put down at all. She has a strong preference for me and I often have to hide when most other people are holding her because if she sees me, she’ll want to come to me. I’m trying to savor this clingy-ness because I know it won’t last and one day I won’t be her favorite person anymore. And now I’m feeling all the feels!

Reese’s Monthly Growth Series // 3

March 10, 2017 by lauren.anvari@gmail.com 1 Comment

12 pounds (34th percentile), has found her hands, coos and babbles a lot, still hates tummy time, no laughs yet, smiles more often, falls asleep on her own, first plane trip (to Texas), eyes are brown, thrush is gone

Reese is 3 months old and the time is just flying by. Developmentally she seems to be somewhat behind where her brother and sister were at this age, but she’s her own person after all (something I have to keep reminding myself of). She hasn’t laughed yet, but she is smiling more. It could just be that she doesn’t find me funny. She has found her hands and loves sucking on her knuckles. She’s very talkative and is often cooing or babbling. Reese still takes a pacifier but she’s not as in love with it as she once was, instead, she’d much rather nurse, and since her weight percentile has increased, I guess it’s paid off!

We’ve finally kicked thrush to the curb and fingers crossed it doesn’t come back to hitch a ride again. She’s a much happier little girl than she once was, but she also such a serious child. While she smiles more often it’s still not all that frequent and instead, she likes to look at everyone with a very serious expression on her face. She sticks her tongue out a lot and will often like me when I’m kissing her, which isn’t pleasant.

Reese sleeps fairly well. I no longer swaddle her during the day and I tried to stop swaddling her at night but she just isn’t ready yet as her arms keep startling her awake. She’s a pretty floppy baby, which is something I’m not used to, but it does make her extra cuddly, which I love. She’s a mommy’s girl and is happiest when she’s with me. This girl still loves her sleep although she is spending more and more time awake, which is nice.

Asher and Bennett are still enamored with her and it’s so sweet how affectionate and attentive they are towards her. We took her first plane ride to Texas and she didn’t love it. She was pretty fussy on the flight but nothing terrible. She does, however, enjoy the warmer weather in Texas and loves being outside, which is something she has in common with her older siblings. Reese has the loveliest olive complexion and I think she may actually be our Persian looking child. Her thighs have filled out deliciously and she’s got a chunky backside to go with them.

I found out that I have a torn meniscus this month, so I’ll be having knee surgery to repair that April 3rd, followed by 6 weeks of crutches. I honestly don’t know how I’ll function with an infant let alone the older two. But I’m sure we’ll find a way. Thank goodness my parents live nearby!

Reese’s Monthly Growth Series \\ 1

January 12, 2017 by lauren.anvari@gmail.com 1 Comment

9 lbs 4.5 oz (48th percentile), 21.5 inches long, 14.9 inch head circumference, loves bath time, sleeps constantly, only really sleeps touching mommy, doesn’t care much for nursing, got thrush, had a tongue tie clipped, has a clogged tear duct, very fussy when she’s awake (which is rare), eyes are dark grey/brown, looks most like big brother Asher

I can’t believe it’s been a month already! This has been a hard month for me. Reese has been a challenging infant thus far. She sleeps all the time, but only if she’s on me and when she isn’t sleeping she’s been incredibly fussy, purple crying.

She nurses only when she absolutely must and the rest of the time wants nothing to do with it. She won’t nurse to be soothed or for comfort only to eat and even then she stops just as soon as she can, rarely draining my breast or taking a full feed. The first two weeks I was waking her up to nurse every 2-3 hours but since then I’ve been letting her feed on demand, well kinda, I still offer her my breast often, she only sometimes will take it. When she is nursing more often than not she chokes while feeding and pulls off, sputtering and coughing, only to then start screaming in annoyance. If I can coax her back to the breast, she’ll nurse a bit more and then stop. She detaches often to fuss while feeding, which results in a lot of milk being sprayed everywhere. On the rare occasion that she does do something close to a full feed, she vomits everything right up. So needless to say this aspect has been pretty stressful. I was frankly amazed that she had gained the weight that she has.

She sleeps a lot and I know that sounds like a good thing, except that she’ll really only sleep when she’s on me or right next to me. I spent the second half of this month working on getting her to sleep anywhere else, with little success. It would take me around 2 hours to put her to sleep in the bassinet at night. Every time I put her down she’d wake up screaming and after a few times of that she’d start purple crying and wouldn’t be soothed by anything until she finally became so tired that she’d more or less pass out. At first I stuck with it because at least after the initial battle to get her to sleep she’d stay asleep for a good 4 hours but that was short lived and she then started waking up every 45 minutes to an hour, which quickly became unbearable since she wouldn’t nurse back to sleep, so I resigned myself to having her sleep on me in the evenings until I went to bed at which point she slept in the bed next to me. She wears a breathing monitor to give me peace of mind, but it’s definitely not ideal as I just don’t sleep as well when she’s next to be, especially since she has to be touching me which means I can’t roll over or change positions at all.

And then there’s the crying. It’s such a grating cry. She spends almost all her time asleep unless she’s nursing and really dislikes being awake. She is almost always extremely angry whenever she’s awake and again won’t be soothed by nursing, so it’s been a real challenge. If she isn’t crying, she’s looking at us with the grumpiest of looks. She mainly just wants me to hold her against my chest so she can sleep. I’ve worn her a couple times, but since my core muscles are basically atrophied it’s really hard on my back at the moment. Sometimes she just wakes up screaming even when she’s on me or right next to me, leaving me at a loss. It’s been pretty challenging.

Reese was born with a clogged tear duct which isn’t supposed to bother her, but if I don’t stay on top of wiping all the gunk away her eye basically becomes glued shut and her little eyelashes pull whenever she tried to open her eyes. We’ve also had thrush. I just can’t seem to avoid it with my kids. I used gentian violet for a week, which got rid of the white patches on her tongue, but then it became apparent that her gums and the roof of her mouth were bleeding, poor thing. Turns out thrush can do that when it gets really bad. So now she’s been prescribed 14 days of liquid fluconazole and I have to use a nystatin nipple balm. Fingers crossed that this get’s rid of it.

We’ve had such an outpouring of support from our new community up here in Maine, with people bringing us meals and taking Asher and Bennett on playdates. And my parent’s have been really helpful, but also a bit overwhelmed since my brother and sister-in-law had their 3rd child the day before Reese was born and they’ve basically been helping watch 4 kids and take care of 2 postpartum women and infants. Raf’s aunt also came to stay for a week, which was such a God send. And Raf works from home now and even though he wasn’t able to take time off that does mean that he can pop in a help if I really need him to and it does allow for more flexibility in his schedule. But even with all that, it somehow feels like we’ve had less support or help this time around than we did with the other two. I think it has something to do with the fact that with the other two we had family visiting and staying with us which resulted in 24/7, round the clock help. So it’s been really hard on me emotionally. I’m also hormonal and probably have some baby blues but I’ve been crying a lot and I’ve pretty much just felt invisible most of the time. Like no one really sees me. Which is all new territory for me. After Asher and Bennett were born I was so blissfully happy I felt like I was floating. So that’s been a real bummer. Raf has been doing his best to be as supportive as possible but it’s just been really hard on me. I wasn’t entirely sure I would write about this here and perhaps this topic needs a dedicated post of it’s own, but I do feel it’s important to talk about these things and to shed light on the topics of baby blues and postpartum depression if only to destigmatize them. So please let me know if you want me to write more in depth about this topic.

On a lighter note, she really loves bath time. It’s really the only place I’ve seen her look remotely content or happy. Asher and Bennett absolutely adore her. They are constantly asking to hold her, kiss her and hug her. It’s really so sweet. Every time she cries they both run to her and try to calm her OR they immediately tell me that she’s crying, even if I’m clearly right next to her. It’s pretty sweet. Bennett has really blossomed into her role as a big sister. She gives Reese the gentlest of kisses albeit while squashing her with the rest of her body, but still. Bennett isn’t so thrilled to have to share me, but at least she doesn’t seem to harbour any jealousy or resentment towards Reese. Since Asher is older this time around he really understands what it means to be a big brother. He keeps exclaiming how cute she is and asking for reassurance that we’re keeping her. He really seems a bit worried that we may just send her back or something. He’s really quite taken with her. Both Asher and Bennett have been great mommy’s little helpers. I’m just in awe of how gracefully they’re handling this transition, even if they have been acting up a bit more as they vie for attention.

We really can’t decide who Reese looks like. Everyone says she looks like Asher, but Raf and I just don’t recognise her when we look at her little face. I think she has Raf’s mom’s nose, my mouth and Raf’s eyes. But to me, she just looks so different than Asher and Bennett. I think her nose is really throwing us off since Asher and Bennett have the same nose and Reese’s is so clearly different. I do believe we will actually have a brown eyed child this time as her eyes are a dark muddy grey. She’ll be our brown eyed girl 🙂 I’m definitely looking forward to settling into our new normal as a family of five!!

Bennett’s Monthly Growth Series \\ 11

January 29, 2016 by lauren.anvari@gmail.com Leave a Comment

started walking (!!!), can stand herself up unassisted, first time touching snow, nearly mastered the stairs, fell down the stairs, loves removing all the books from the bookshelves, naps 30 minutes max, started giving kisses, climbs everything, first trip to Texas, strong separation anxiety, very attached to mommy

This little ray of sunshine started walking! This past month she has hit quite a few big milestones and I’m enjoying every second with her. Although she can walk she still mostly chooses to crawl and will only walk when we’re encouraging it or if it’s a very short distance. I think she still needs to gain some confidence. Where she lacks confidence in walking she makes up for in climbing. If you aren’t watching her closely, the next think you know she’s on top of the coffee table, or standing on the backrest of the couch looking out the window. If there is ever an option to go vertical she will take it. She also learned to stand up all on her own and it is the cutest thing to see because she absolutely beams with pride whenever she does it.

Bennett LOVES climbing up and down the stairs and I must say she has gotten pretty good at it, but she fall down half a flight this month. It was a mix up of communication. I assumed Raf had his eye on her and he thought I had it covered and the next thing we knew…boom,boom,boom,boom,boom,WAIL. My heart nearly stopped in my chest. But thankfully she wasn’t hurt at all, just pretty scared. I wish I got off so lucky whenever I fall down the stairs (a frequent occurrence).

We went and visited Raf’s side of the family in Texas this month and not surprisingly, Bennett was a huge hit. It became clear while in Texas that Miss B has some very strong separation anxiety when it comes to me, which I both love and find inconvenient.

Bennett is extremely attached to me. She likes to know where I am at all times and wants to be able to see me. Even when she’s playing, she’ll come up to me periodically to check in and get a quick snuggle before going about her business. I am savoring every tiny moment of this time because I know that my days of being her favorite person on the planet are numbered.

Her rolls are melting away as she becomes increasingly more mobile and I hate it. She did get RSV this month so I’m sure that didn’t help. Both kids had to use a nebulizer every 4 hours and Bennett HATED it and pretty much screamed the entire time. Speaking of screaming, she also got to experience snow for the first time this month and let me tell you, she was not pleased. She must take after her Mama after all. Asher on the other hand must be half abominable snow man. That kid can and does spend hours out in the snow and still has to be dragged inside. He is so lucky to have such an accommodating father.

Bennett’s naps have fallen to pieces this month. She takes two naps a day and really only sleeps 20-30 minutes both times. For the morning nap I don’t really mind because we’re usually have a lot of things going on in the morning. The afternoon nap on the other hand is when both kids are down at the same time and that’s my recharge time. She will nap longer if she’s napping next to me in a dark room only because I’m able to get her to fall back asleep after she wakes up 20 minutes in. But I’ve found that I then fall asleep and it really messes with my sleep pattern (we’ve been making huge efforts to get to bed early). I know what I need to do to get her to sleep longer but I’m not super motivated to do them. Her mood isn’t suffering and she’s content for the time being to play quietly in the same room as me. I may hold off and see if things change on their own once she drops her morning nap before making any concerted effort to extend her afternoon nap.

I can’t believe I only have one more of these monthly updates for Bennett! She’ll be 1 year old next month, a whole trip around the sun! Just thinking about it makes every fiber of my being ache. My sweet baby is just growing up before my very eyes.